Mary had a little lamb;
she also had a beau.

Her lamb followed her
everywhere. Her beau
was just so so

and jealous of Mary’s
friendship with her
faithful lamb.

After many fights with
her beau about her
friendship with the lamb,

Mary realized she had
to choose between
the lamb and the beau.

But when Mary was
at work baking a
plum pie

for a customer named
Jack Horner,

her beau kidnapped
her lamb, drove him
50 miles away to a
lamb slaughterhouse.

When Mary came
home, he told her
her lamb had
run way.

But what her beau
didn’t know
is Mary had had
her lamb
microchipped

and she saved
her lamb just in
time as he was
about to be
slaughtered.

She kicked her
beau out of her
house,

said I don’t need
no man,

and her and her
lamb

lived happily
ever after.

Bob Boyd